- you are bored
- have nothing important to do for some time
- have some active Facebook users in your ‘friends’ list
Sit on your Facebook Home Page and refresh it from time to time and read the status messages from your ‘friends’. And believe me you will experience a myriad of expressions, ranging from LOL to ROFL; irritation to intrigue, amazement to disgust… they are from living room to bed room, hostel mess to stomach gas, break-ups to patch-ups, in all meant to thoroughly entertain you.
Don’t believe me?? Here are the actual Facebook Status Updates. Names and identities have been withheld to protect myself from the anger and wrath of fellow Facebook users!!
- The Weather Reporters: The forecast on your TV or that small section in the newspaper are simply passé, coz you have friends who will give you the 100% authentic weather report and will also share their expectations and thoughts.
- Rain is falling chhama chham chham…
- Baarish ho rahi hai…it’s raining, it’s raining…
- The rain Gods are quiet since morning......Ye dil Maangae More!!!!!
- No rains, water supply halved, power cut chaloo !!! Tera kya hoga Rajasthan!!
- “I can do anything for comments’: They’ll post some vague comment and then you will have a whole lot of ‘Ohs’ and ‘Aahs’ from their friends. Example…
- XYZ : Feeling Sad :(((((
- Friend 1 : What happened, baby?
- Friend 2 : Oh, are you alright??
- Friend 3 : Cheer up :)
- Friend 4 :Pls share…. waiting!
- Friend 5 :Don’t worry, be happy.
- Friend 6 : Arz kiya hai..ahem...kisi ko mukammal jahaan nahin milta..kisi ko zameen kisi ko aasmaan nahi milta...wah! wah! Oh yaar..chill! It too shall pass :)
- XYZ : Oh, it’s a touchy subject.
- The Suggestion Seekers : These guys need suggestions for anything and everything on Facebook.
- Wanna groove on some good hip-hop beats... any suggestions??
- Needs to lose 40 lbs (pregnancy weight) :( It is going to be challenging again but I gotta do it no matter what. Any suggestions on how can I achieve my goal?
- Thinking Out Loud…Very Loud : What’s better than Facebook?
- P, Q and R have invaded my house.... guys, please leave..... It’s time to sleep!!
- ABC is wondering what I should wear today, My Halo & Wings or My Horns & Tail....???
- Profound Answer Seekers : Life’s deeper thoughts and answers are looked for, here.
- Why do people lie for small –small things??
- Do you believe you can be with someone, say nothing and walk away feeling like you have had the best conversation in your life?
- Witty Ones : These are the ones who spread cheers and smiles. Sometimes original sometimes picked from here and there.
- Why are ‘close’ friends so ‘open’ to one another?
- I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.
- The Commentators: These are the people who will give the running commentary on the events and happenings around…
- 3 Idiots...on Sony Entertainment Television.
- New Zealand vs. Brazil today at the FIFA World Cup for Women.
- The Quote Masters : The QMs provide a regular dose of motivational or witty quotes on your wall. Some give due credit to the celebrity/person who said those famous words while others conveniently ignore it and in so doing, many a times get the “Wows” from their friends.
- My children are trying to ensure that the nice people in white coats come and put me in a padded cell!
- Don't drink and drive....... you might go over a bump and spill your drink!!
- Killers of 2 Birds with One Stone : Self explanatory…
- Strange but true - there are few bloggers who will add you as a friend even if they do not know you or have not visited your blog ever, only so that they can send you the request to join their fan page :P
- Mora piya mo se bolat nahin.... :(
- The Advertisers : No, they are not the advertisers on your TV or newspaper et al, but your very own friends who want the world (their world, of course) to know about their achievements, success and happenings in their life.
- Yippee!! My post PQRST got picked by Blogadda!
- I became a dad today :) Am lost for words to express the feeling!!
- Believers of “Nothing personal about my personal life”: Such people will share their very personal life stories or moments here.
- Ah my ego - I didn't call my husband for 15 days. And when I did, he didn't take my call for the next 15 days because of his ego. Long distance relationship creating long distances??
- Backache, body ache and cramps in stomach - ouch..I guess it's that time of the month again.
- The Spammers : The spammers will post silly, trivial, not of importance to anyone but them, or links of various sites, on their status.
- On page 321 of 936 of Shantaram by Gregory David Roberts
- Feeling sleepy.
- The Ranters : Oh, they have a grouse for anything and everything.
- Mumbai roads and traffic - I wish my auto had a fly button.
- I wish people would start minding their own business.
- The Shayars: The poets in making or simply sharing their current state of mind through shers and shayaris or songs
- Ek arsey ke baad sukoon ki neend zara main soya hu...Maa ke kaandhe per sir rakhkar aaj bahot main roya hu..!
- Tere bina zindgi se shikwa ... to nahin ... shikwa nahin ...Tere bina zindgi bhi lekin .... zindgi ... to nahin ... zindgi nahin ... zindgi nahin ...
There is never a dull moment when you are reading the Facebook Status Updates!! What do you think?? Oh, let me make this my Facebook Status. ;)
ROFLMAO...this was so damn hilarious..i can see myself in the post and loving it :P haila, linkback bhi diya? yayy, free publicity :P
ReplyDeletejokes apart, some ppl r so annoying when it comes to status msgs..they spam ur time line..some are even gross - they even talk about PMS!
i have removed spammers from my FB friends list..can't take tht at all!!
loved the post :)
thanks NEHA for inputs.....
ReplyDeletehope that doesn't mean all of these are her status updates...... :)
perfectly categorized......but you shld takes names....that would have made the post more fun......
\,,/
This post is a certified pataka, had me chuckling and nodding in agreement.
ReplyDelete"Strange but true - there are few bloggers who will add you as a friend even if they do not know you or have not visited your blog ever, only so that they can send you the request to join their fan page :P "
Tell me about it!!!!!
and ROFL @ On page 321 of 936 of Shantaram by Gregory David Roberts
@ Hitesh, post is written by shilpa, I just suggested her a thing or two..she is too generous to give me credits for the same..
ReplyDeletedoes it really matter if all are my status updates? point conveyed loud and clear - that's all that matters right? :)
Lol .. you made my eve.. i was so bored ... you made me think..yeah i see this every day.. well next time you try to discover twitter..
ReplyDeletesome people starts with twitter..they posts.. m brushing.. then will say..had coffee.. then about their breakfast..then the dress..their plans for day..its like living commentary at twitter..those who don't have anything interesting to do..they get into facebook or twitter.. it used to be orkut .. sigh......... memories hehe.. well nice post..
You are fantastic with research before posting :)
ReplyDeleteLoved the classification system and I was nodding a giggling as I spotted myself in so many of these categories :)
I was smiling at the thought how wonderfully you've captured the true picture of the blogging world :) :)
keep up the fantastic work :)
Cheers!!
Even without that seven-worded emboldened sentence at the bottom right-hand corner, I just knew.... This post has tireless Ms. Neha "Dangerous" Silam written all over it! :D
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha! Gr8 post :)
ReplyDeleteMora piya mo se bolat nahin.... :( cracked me up :P
What about game players? Forgot em? :P
ReplyDelete@ Neha : Yeah, some of status updates are way too much and give you a laughter fit!! :D
ReplyDeleteand it amazes me at what all people wanna share with the world!! :P
You can see yourself in the post coz, you are an active FB status updater!! :P
Thank YOU!! :)
@ Hitesh : Taking names?? Arre…. what are you saying?? :P
@ Purba : Thanks Purba, am glad you liked this!
Oh, these fan page requests are way too much. :P
@ Nithin R S : Wow! Am glad you enjoyed reading this! :)
You are bang on the twitter updates!! Thanks :)
@ Chatterbox : Thank you CB. Just some of the observations. :P
@ Guria : :)
@ Swaram : Thanks :) Yeah, that one is hilarious! :)
@ Sojo V : No, didn't forget that. Well, they are the feeds from the game application. Here, I tried to list the status which people share. :)
It seems, this evening you were bored and found and created a post to keep all your friends amused.
ReplyDeleteIt is one of the better posts
@ BK Chowla : :P
ReplyDeleteThanks :)
H I L A R I O U S.. :)
ReplyDelete'don't drink and drive....'
'long distance relationship..'
had never heard all these but kya public hai na ? sahi !!!
ROFL! SUper Duper Awesome post :-) Let me go check FB right away ;-)
ReplyDeleteROFL some of the status are hillarious :D
ReplyDeleteI may fall into most of them :P
nicely compiled :D
Hilarious ones. Yeah, I came across an SMS joke. A culprit serving death sentence is going to be hung. He is asked for his last wish and he says "I want to update my Facebook status as "DEAD"
ReplyDeleteSuch is the FB invasion :-D
TV channels kam the jo FB ne yeh nayi musibat khadi kar di hai.....information overload... ooops!..junk overload ;)
ReplyDeleteI have recently started following your blog....and I find all your posts to be well organised and articulate .. u surely have a fan here :)
@ Nu : Yeah, that long distance was truly shocking!! Wonder what’s the motive behind sharing such details on a social networking site!! Sympathy??
ReplyDelete@ Pallavi : Thanks Pallavi. So what did you find?? :D
@ Rajlakshmi : You think so?? :D
Thanks :)
@ Insignia : That’s a good one, Insignia!! Truly, people share anything and everything on FB!
@ Mayur : Agree, so you get wholesome entertainment on TV and FB too (and Twitter as well).
Thanks a lot for the kind words.
Cheers :)
Q: What doyou look forward to in morning and keeps you off sleep at night?
ReplyDeleteA.FB
The invasion is total. Nice compilation of status updates.
ROFL!!! Totally appropriate categorization....
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome post!!!! Hi-five Shilpa. I couldn't stop grining from start to stop. The 'I can do anything for comments' & XYZ/s response was the best. That's become a common phenomenon these days. 'Oh I wish I could cry but the tears won't flow' types !! ;-p
ReplyDeleteYou seem to know the pulse of facebook addicts so well :) Superbly written. Thanks for the laughs.
LMFAO...visited your blog for the first time and I must say its an awesome post out here.Very entertaining.
ReplyDeleteTotally hilarious...
ReplyDeleteLet my auto have a fly button...LOL !!!! :)
This post is damn good...let me make this my status msg....LOL !!! :)
LMAO.
ReplyDeleteI could see Neha in this post. I guess I fall into many categories. I need to be careful from now on :P.
ROFL.... Loved the post ....only you could think of such an hilarious post ....but seriously people at times really forget basics ...I mean what person will update about PMS in public spaces :P
ReplyDeleteWell researched and presented post. You should have spent a lot of time composing it, I am sure. Keep it up. Next what? Orkut??
ReplyDeletePPC Advertising India
Hey Shilpa,
ReplyDeleteThis is super awesome!!
I'm lucky that my status mesg dint figure in the famously infamous list..hehehhee..
I must say of all the FB categories I belong to atleast 1 clearly, The Advertisers..;) Yes?
LOL
lovelovelove this post and it is most definitely the Tangiest..:D
ROFL Shilpa... :) :) very hilarious..
ReplyDelete/*Profound Answer Seekers : Life’s deeper thoughts and answers are looked for, here.
Why do people lie for small –small things??
Do you believe you can be with someone, say nothing and walk away feeling like you have had the best conversation in your life? */
ha ha ha... can't stop laughing @ Profound answer seekers :D :D
How you the people who just post songs???
congrats on the blogadda pick :)
ReplyDeleteI can see you setting your status to, "Yay! Got picked by BlogAdda for my awesome post!" Haha just kidding. This made me LOL for a while!
ReplyDeleteHilarious post, Shilpa. Actually I was looking to see if there was an update of mine! ;)
ReplyDeleteI liked this one immensely:
"My children are trying to ensure that the nice people in white coats come and put me in a padded cell!"
:)))
Congrats on the Blogadda pick :)
hahaaha...well deserved blogadda pick... :))
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely hilarious! Loved, loved and laughed :)
ReplyDeleteInteresting compilation of FB status updates. Passtime, totally! And the extent to which people go to, is amazing!
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha, that was a very funny summary of facebook status! I coudl recognise me as the "commentators".
ReplyDeleteyes, FB is fun on a boring day.
@ The Holy Lama : Oh my god!! How true!! :D
ReplyDeleteThanks :)
@ Prats : Thank you!! :)
@ lostworld : Thanks a lot Rohitha! I know, that was hilarious!! I mean create all the hulla about your current state and then say ‘that’!! Amazing!! :D
@ Meher : Welcome Meher on this space and thanks :)
@ UmaS : Am glad it brought some smiles and laughter! :D
Thanks :)
@ Harini : Oh yes, Neha’s 4 status messages are featuring here (and one from her hubby too :P)
Oh, please you must not do that!! :P
@ Dhiman : Thanks Dhiman! I know, its really amazing, what all people share on FB. :P
@ Sunadararajan : Thank you. Well, not a lot of time on composing it but researching it, yes!
Thanks. No, I don’t use Orkut anymore!!
@ Vibhuti : Thanks a lot Vibhuti. Me in an advertiser too :P
@ kanaguonline : Yeah, you have loads of them around! :D
Songs…they are in The Shayars!! :)
Thank you so much! :)
@ Mayur : I actually said that in my status message! :D
@ Shail : Thank you Shail. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd what was your reaction after not seeing any of your status here?? :P
Thanks a lot! :)
@ Pushpee : Thank you Pushpee :)
@ IHM : Thanks a lot! And am glad! :)
@ RGB : Thank you RGB. :)
Oh yes, some are truly weird!! :)
@ The Panorama : Oh you identified yourself here!! :) Cool :)
FB is fun unlimited!! :)
LMAO! That's a great research! I was literally nodding for all your points. Well said! My FB list has Divine ppl - seeking XXX' blessings
ReplyDeletePeople who wanted to know what happens next (the astrology seekers!), Farmville players postting status about their farm every now and then...
@ Vaish : Hi Vaish! Welcome at this space.
ReplyDeleteAm glad you could relate to all of them. Thanks :)
Well, the things that you shared here are application related and are the feeds related to them, so haven't touched them here. This post focuses on the personal messages people share as their status messages.
Cheers :)
cudn't stop myself from commenting...
ReplyDeletea blaster ofcourse..
and mind me, I won't repaeat those messages again..
Ha ha he he he.....
ReplyDelete:D
:D
he he he he ......
Am still rolling with laughter ....
@ RSV : Thanks Rahul!!
ReplyDeleteLOL :)
@ Aashima : Good, you had a nice hearty laugh!! Enjoy!! :)
Hilarious! And so true! :D
ReplyDelete